All at once
“what does it feel like when he reads you?”
like every bee found pollination
in my stomach and made honey
with every breath i took
“what does it feel like when he bears your hand?”
like every war has subsided
like the last bomb went off and everyone
had gone home to their loved ones
“what does it feel like when he slips ‘love’ from his teeth?”
like every heartbeat i’ve ever felt,
happening all at once
Ante meridiem
two in the morning
the sky and my room
share the same dark
you send me pictures
of the mountains in canada
how fresh snow blanketed
the slopes you stood on
i admire fresh snow,
a clean slate that covers
up past footsteps
and avalanches that fell
by volumes of a voice
though silence came out of my smile
we spoke in the middle
of ante meridiem
while the world was sound asleep
and there i left you hanging
off the cliff of my lips
when i had fallen in my REM cycle
and when the fire rose over the horizon
you were gone before the light came in
two in the morning
the sky and my room
share the same dark
you send me pictures
of the mountains in canada
how fresh snow blanketed
the slopes you stood on
i admire fresh snow,
a clean slate that covers
up past footsteps
and avalanches that fell
by volumes of a voice
though silence came out of my smile
we spoke in the middle
of ante meridiem
while the world was sound asleep
and there i left you hanging
off the cliff of my lips
when i had fallen in my REM cycle
and when the fire rose over the horizon
you were gone before the light came in
homeless
at the border of a scale
you found me in my exile
as i fled my body
the native land in which
feels foreign to me now
a barren, skinny place
i don’t like to call home
I knew I would see you again
there you are all handsome
hair sticking up, never brushed
and there i stand all in awe
cotton mouth and blank thoughts
words unable to string together
to hang up a sentence of confession
how after these empty years
you’re still invited to all my parties
the ones with christmas lights
in obscure months and confetti
strewn all over hardwood floors
and we would tiptoe to your room
lock the door with chains and hands
and finally touch after holding back
swaddle you in arms that never
grew tired of holding your absence
Steel skin
my mother was probably unaware
that she birthed a boy with glass skin
a boy so transparent yet not invisible enough
to feel protected, to feel hidden
grew up to be the boy dressed
as a punching bag
an easy target for archers
and their sharp bow and arrows
still learning to stain his glass enough
to not be invisible
but rather invincible
Strut
bravo to the clinically depressed,
you act a smile better than
most oscar award winners
so walk that runway
wear your comforter as an
oscar de la renta dress
drape the sadness along
the red carpet
keep that smile cracked
you’re known for never
breaking out of character
20/20
when my father tells me
i’m his entire world
i’m blindsided for a moment
i forget he has trouble with his eyes,
fades in and out of vision sometimes
unable to see his creation
but at least when he embraces me
he can still feel himself
holding the world in his arms
